OCW RIOT 477

OCWFED.com Presents Riot

The Camera Pans To The Ramp!

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”Yankee Doodle” still blares thru The Garden As H2… excuse me HOOAH 2O salutes the crowd from each side of the ring.

Cort Marshall clearly isn’t happy with this turn of events. He waits impatiently for the audience to settle down. They are excited to see HOOAH 2O back to himself!

Cort walks over to the ring announcer in a haste and snatches the mic from her. He marches his way into the ring as HOOAH 2O is standing at attention. As if he's awaiting instructions for The Sarge himself.

Cort paces around him like a lion stalking his prey. The men are squared up face to face. The crowd is excited for whatever may happen.

Cort: Look who finally decided to show up. Harv-

H2O: HOOOOO-AH, SIR!!!

Cort reels back, getting a whiff of H2O’s breath.

Cort: What is that God awful….

H2O: STENCH-OF-CHEAP-CHEWING-TOBACCO COVERED-UP-BY-5-STAR-PEPPERMINT-GUM…. SORRY SIR!

Cort: So, you think you're real cute in daddy’s outfit? Trying to imitate your betters?

H2O: YOU LIKE TO CALL ME OUT AND TELL ME WHAT I CAN OR CANNOT DO! SIR!!!

H2O: SO I'M HERE TO BE….

H2O becomes at ease, stop yelling and grins. He slowly takes off the Cort imitation shades and pokes Marshall in the chest with them.

H2O: All that I can be.

H2O spits the nasty chewing gum in Cort’s face. Cort is absolutely appalled and attempts to rush H2O with a clothesline. H2O swiftly ducks and cracks the end of his flag pole across Cort’s back.

Cort’s body cringes to the pain. His momentum bounces him off the ropes as H2O drops the flagpole, motioning for a superkick. Cort notices right away, grabs onto the ropes, and slides out of the ring. The crowd sighs, hoping they’d see boot connect to military chin.

H2O taunts Cort to get back into the ring. He’s having none of it. So he motions to the ring announcer for his mic. The ring announcer hands it over to him.

H2O: Where you going, Cort? Isn't this what you wanted out of me?

H2O: Let's make one thing clear. By no means is H2O a quitter. By no means will I ever turn my back on OCW or my fans.

H2O: What I've gone thru this year was worse than ANY boot camp you ever experienced. So don't you dare sit there and pretend you'd do much better than me if you were in the same circumstances.

H2O: Yeah, I've given up my Head Rookie campaign after you defeated me. It was never about you though.

H2O I'm sure you know, “Sarge”, it's not about winning the battle it's about winning the war.

H2O: A war that had nothing to do with you. The only war you need to worry about winning is with the military itself to up your weekly allowance. I've seen hobos right here in NYC have better living conditions than you do.

The audience laughs as H2O takes a minute to spit out the remaining tobacco left over in his mouth. Meanwhile, Cort is fuming ripping down fans signs and telling them to shut up.

H2O: Dude, no wonder why you military guys are so bitter. You chew this garbage and sing Christmas Carols around campfires all night. Ugh.

Cort: Damn right we sing Christmas carols! Christmas is a good Christian holiday about love and acceptance and toy store tramplings and the creeping advance of righteous capitalist greed over the free world! What else would we sing in the burned out villages of people we’ve marched all over?

H2O shakes his head.

H2O: Cort I believe you've more than you're worth. I'll raise the stakes.

H2O pauses for a moment as he paces around the ring. The anticipation is building around him.

H2O: I just have to ask you all… what’s Summercide… without H! Two! Oh!

Madison Square Garden erupts. Cort seems to be interested as well.

H2O: The campaign will end at Summercide. You, Cort Marshall, versus the reigning Head Rookie! Yeah I said it! The battle to see who will be the Head Rookie once and for all!

H2O hangs over the ropes and waits for Cort’s response.

Cort paces back and forth, characteristic scowl twitching into an evil smile.

Cort: You want me at Summercide, you little punk? You got me! I’ll chew you up and….

Cort turns back to the barricade and hawks a loogie onto a rather rotund, bearded fan, who swings with a wild fat guy right in response. Cort deftly dodges and brings the mic back up to his chin.

Cort: ... spit you out!

H2O smiles, putting both hands up in a mocking “we got a badass over here” way.

H2O: Just like you did tonight with Flynn, huh?

The crowd pops big for that one as Cort looks around with a face like an old asian woman who was just overcharged for cabbages. He brings the mic to his mouth, opens his mouth… but then lets it back down and tosses it on the floor, shaking his head. He backs away from the ring and up the ramp while pointing at H2O and then back at himself--the universal “you and me” gesture. H2O just smirks and gives him a little “buh-bye” wave.

H2O: Summercide will be the turning point of both of our careers. I'll be ready for The Battle of Head Rookie.

H2O: Oh and but this time Cort, I WILL deliver an Energy Shot to the head worse than any bullet round that ever hitcha.

His real theme starts playing as he slides out of the ring and walks up the ramp, soaking up the crowd’s adulation as he does so. He high fives a couple fans wearing one of his shirts before heading to the back.