I can't wait! We have an amazing show for you tonight!
So lets get it going with a TURKEY KICK!!!
Deep in the halls of Madison Square Garden, we find the most brightly lit room where we find Molly who has just gotten dressed for her match tonight with Madison. With focus on her face she starts to do her stretching routine.
The door to the room swings open but nobody walks out of it at first…...until we see The Lord of the Lariat, the OCW World Champion and the King of Kindness, Mugen spinning into the room wearing a white suit that would make even Colonel Sanders jealous. He pats the belt around at his waist as he points at Molly. Her focused face now has turned to confusion.
Mugen: My dear! Do you know what this week is?
Molly: Uh…...Riot? I got a match with Madison?
Mugen: No no no no no no………….its one of my Top 5 Holidays. Thanksgiving!
Molly: Top 5? What else do you have in that list?
Mugen: Well Christmas is of course #1 because I love giving and giving to those who are willing to receive my gifts.
Molly:(whispering under her breath) ...phrasing….
Mugen: Then we have Boxing Day! A day where I get to do boxing with random strangers in the street.
Molly:(whispering under her breath) …..sort of phrasing?....
Mugen: All Saints Day! And of course…...MY BIRTHDAY WOOOO
Molly tries to get back to stretching and is seemingly half focused on Mugen.
Mugen: But yes, it is Thanksgiving and I was thinking that we invite our friends to Sakuraba’s and have a Friendsgiving.
Molly: Who would you invite?
Mugen: Well we would invite those closest to us like Bobby, Drago, Ryu and Versus. I mean you could invite Jessica Jessie.
Molly: Um….I would rather not invite that dumb blonde bimbo.
Mugen: My dear! She was your roommate for years in college!
Molly: Ugh….don’t remind me…..
At that moment, Bobby Minio conveniently walks into the room.
Bobby Minio: I heard someone say Bobby?
Mugen: Yes we were making fun of you.
Mugen starts slapping his knees in laughter to the chagrin of Molly.
Mugen: Just kidding, we wanted to invite you to Mugen’s 1st Annual Friendsgiving this week at Sakuraba’s.
Bobby Minio: Friendsgiving? Oh is this like a Thanksgiving thing?
With a smile, Mugen nods at Bobby.
Bobby Minio: … Thanksgiving is basically my… sixth, maybe seventh favorite holiday… and my dude, you’ve got a match coming up with that Kassidy.
There is a brief moment as Bobby stares at Mugen with a quizzical look written across his face.
Bobby Minio: Jesus, did you forget? Did you forget about the upcoming match with Hayes? Muge, remember what I said to you? About keeping your in the game?
Mugen: Bobby, let me reassure you, I am focused.
Bobby Minio: I sure as hell hope so. I’ll guarantee you right now, Kassidy has something on his mind right now, and it sure as hell ain’t Friendsgiving. He’s here to take that title off ya, he’s not trying to slip off with a plate of food-
At that moment, Ryu Matsumoto walks into the room.
Ryu: I heard food?
Molly: Seriously, do you guys just not knock? It’s my freaking locker room here.
Mugen: Our locker room my dear.
Molly: UGH I need concentration!
Molly throws her hands up in the air and walks out of the room. The guys look at each other and shrug.
Ryu: Women amirite?
Bobby Minio: Okay list-
Mugen: Anyways, I was just talking about Friendsgiving this week Ryu, and I was going to extend an invitation to you.
Bobby Minio: Hold up-
Ryu: Well of course I’ll join you for Friendsgiving. Sounds wonderful, but can I invite my sons Kassidy and the Trashleks?
Bobby Minio: What?! No way! Well, I mean sure, bring your Trashleks or whatever the hell but, your SON Kassidy? First of all, I was out of the country for… a while so I must have missed something, and second, why would Mugen invite a man who’s lusting over his title to break bread?
Mugen looks at Bobby and motions for him to calm down.
Mugen: It’s fine, it’s fine. Ryu, you can certainly bring Kassidy. After all, I don’t have a beef with him, I got plenty of turkey at the party.
Mugen and Ryu both start laughing uncontrollably at the terrible dad joke as Bobby looks on in bewilderment.
Mugen: No seriously, invite him and the rest of your family. Everybody is welcome after all I am the King of Kindness.
Mugen looks at the camera.
Mugen: In fact, for all of you watching at home. You are all friends of mine. Come down to Sakuraba’s and spend your Thanksgiving with your friend, yours truly, Mugen.
Mugen flashes a thumbs up towards the camera as the scene fades out.
The camera pans to the announce team.
He has seriously lost his mind!
Or maybe he found the LIGHT? ever stop to think about that? always negative.
The audible din of construction work greets the audience, sawing, drilling, hammering and the disgusting hollering of workmen.
The camera goes fully live, showing the formerly vacant Dorien Arnaud Skybox with a sign saying “Under New Management.” We pan out further, seeing a well dressed, exquisitely groomed Thomas Archer on his brand new iPear 20VX.
Archer: Yes, yes, it went off without a hitch. They settled for far less than I expected, but you know how it is, those sorts of people do not understand real money, they’re desperate for any penny they can get.
The individual at the other end of the phone is inaudible.
Archer: Oh, it should be finished in a matter of weeks, unlike my private room over on Turmoil, that seems to be hitting a few snags, I’m amazed that place has running water.
Archer’s face turns to one that is a hybrid of disgust and confusion.
Archer: I’ll need to call you back… Judging by his hair I think a homeless man has wandered in and… He’s just staring at me.
Archer hangs up on his business partner, slipping the phone into the inside pocket of his suit coat.
Archer: You, peasant… Can I help you?
He asks, the camera swivelling to show none other than the returning, B-17.
B-17: Actually, I think I can help you. I enjoyed your match, it was good, mightily impress. More specifically, I enjoyed how you took out his legs from under his leg, I love a good leg workout.
Archer: Are you some sort of sexual voyeur? Or are you mentally ill?
B-17: Neither. I just wanted to give you some advice… None of that would work on me… To let you in on a secret, I don’t flip… Or kick… So uh… Should we happen to face off, you’re going to lose.
Archer scoffs, shaking his head in disbelief.
Archer: I know who you are! Huge nose, horribly, horribly bland and boring… You’re that guy that got fired for gross misconduct.
Archer:
That’s hilarious, you should do stand up, especially if you think you stand a chance against me. I’ve got some advice, you don’t even need to go to human resources this time to get some facts checked…
Archer:
Stapling a dead dog to your skull is not going to make you interesting or funny… It just makes you as pathetic as all of the peasants here at RIOT tonight.
B17 stops twirling his hair and considers Archer for a moment: Bland and boring, are you talking about Jacob Trance? He's retired. Look, I don't know what you just said, but I don't need flips or kicks when I have this.
B17 brings up his right fist and clasps his left hand around his wrist and begins to cock his fist, but instead of stopping after one he keeps going.
B17: I would do this to you.
B17 continues to cock his fist, over and over: Relax it won't hurt that much. Just one pop and it's usually done. And I’m good at hitting small spots.
Archer: Please stop.
B17: That’s it. Beg for mercy!
Archer: Here… Take this… And go.
B17: No, not yet. See I only need my fists. You can take my legs out, but I don’t need them, I’ve practice punching from my back too.
B17 lays down on the ground and begins to punch upward: See? No legs. Just fists. And some hip.
B17 begins a double fist bump, with some hip gyration.
Archer: It...It...but...
Archer reaches into his jacket pocket and makes it rain on the prone man. Mr 17 looks ecstatic: Perfect, I’m in need of more hair products.
Archer: BUY A BETTER WIG YOU FILTHY ANIMAL!
Archer quickly flees the scene, making a mental note to ensure Oliver and Michael, the security, are with him on future outings, never wanting to be escorted again and forced to interact with such disgusting creatures. B17 stands up and walks away, counting his money and we go back to ringside.
The camera pans to the announce team.
On the plus side all that money can buy quality mental health care.
........You ain't wrong!
The camera pans to the announce team.
COLOR ME EXCITED!!!!
Indeed!
Once again, Stacy Clark is standing outside of Stigmata's locker room. And once again, before she can knock, the door swings open to reveal a grinning Stigmata. The camera catches a glimpse of another person, but Stigmata quickly steps out and shuts the door.
Stacy Clark: Who was that?
Stigmata: hmmm? I don't know what you mean...
Stacy Clark: In your dressing room? Who was that?
Stigmata: Why do you ask so many questions?
Stacy Clark: Err...It's kind of my job....
Stigmata: (smiling) There was nobody in my dressing room. Can we get on with this?
Stacy Clark (agitated): Yes, there clearly was....You know what? Fine.....
Stacy Clark: Stigmata, I'm here to get your thoughts on your upcoming match with Crossbones.
Stigmata: Ahh yes. The deranged pirate captain, with no ship. Is this match even going to happen?
Stacy Clark: Of course it is. Why would you ask that?
Stigmata looks at his wrist, although there is no watch on it.
Stigmata: It's getting pretty close to crunch time, and from what I've heard, he hasn't even showed up to the arena yet.
Stigmata: Maybe he is lost at sea? Maybe he's in a a galaxy far, far away? Whatever the reason is, I think he's going to no show our match. And really, who can blame him?
Stacy Clark: Who can blame him?
Stigmata: That was my question. You get paid for this? Seriously?
Stigmata: Listen, if that reject from a bad Disney movie ever does find his way to Riot, I'll hit him with the CoT, and that will clear up all his amnesia problems, real damned quick. Or make them way worse. I don't know. Really, who cares? Its Crossbones.
Stigmata points at his nonexistent wristwatch, grins at Stacy, and heads to the gorilla position, and as if on cue, his iconic horror music blares through the arena.
The camera pans to the announce team.
He is not mincing words!
He sounds like he has been here for ages!
B17 vs Ricky The Dragon
The camera pans to the announce team.
He is a one man wrecking crew!
Bodies everywhere!
We turn to OCW’s most refreshing superstar of today, H2O. He is joined by the lovely, Stacy Clark in the green room conversing over some finger food.
H2O: ¿Buenas noches, Stacy?
H2O quickly swallows his food and greets Stacy with a kiss on the cheek.
Stacy: Hey, Harvey! Surprised to see you eating that instead of this delicious spread of hors d’oeuvres.
H2O: Not for nothing, but Brown Sugar Cinnamon pop tarts is one of my favorite snacks of all time with some OJ.
H2O: Speaking of which could you spare me some change for the vending machine? They got some Florida’s Natural in there I need to drink with this. I left my wallet in my locker.
Stacy:(Chuckles) Sure, Harvey. Oh and by the way, where's Anthony? I went to knock on the door to your locker room; there was no answer.
H2O: What do you mean?
H2O grabs the OJ out of the machine and heads towards his locker room which is always a few feet away from the green room.
He walks in and finds that Baker is gone.
H2O: I hope he hasn't gone far. We have a match pretty soon.
Stacy: Take it easy on him, Harvey. He seems down the last time I saw him tonight.
H2O: I know. But don't worry. B2O will be making their debut tonight to take out The Trash and that other guy who's Betterness smells worse than a week old carton of milk.
H2O: See me later, doll.
H2O gives Stacy a wink and walks out of the locker room in search of his best friend.
