Jackman: I came out here today to declare myself the Tag Team Champions. What I did last week was bound to happen win or loss.
The crowd begins to boo even louder.
Jackman: All you people may not understand why I did that, but Tay Terror was weighing me down. Go back to our matches you can see it there, I even got the pinfalls.
Jackman: Hell I even beat him in a singles match.
Jackman: So what I did had to be done.
The Camera Pans To The Ramp!
Jackman: Oh god it’s you guys again.
Fury: You guys want to hear a joke? Real funny, haha. A Scotsman and a Puerto Rican walk into a wrestling show…
Wrex: Then what happens Jay?
Fury: They get over, muy grande! Big time.
Wrex: But the boss man doesn’t like it, and keeps them stuck working on their own…
Fury: El jefe no sucede, no sucede. And that… That makes me angry.
Wrex: Is it cause we don’t fit into the companies mold of what a tag team is? What do we need to do to get some actual recognition around here?
Wrex: I’m guessing become a massive joke considering this entire division has been comedy acts, stuntmen and Italian stereotypes.
Wrex exchanges a glance with his partner who just shrugs.
Jackman: So you guys are a comedy act? Well, that is a sigh of relief. I thought you guys came out here for these titles.
Wrex: Correct me if I’m wrong… But you’re the one living in a piss stained box and worked with some asylum jumper..
Jackman: All of that piss should be cleaned off by now.
Wrex: Trust me it isn’t.
Wrex: But enough about your homelife, because we are here to get down to business. And yes, we’re here for those belts. Considerin’ that you’re missing a partner, and there is two belts. I guess that makes us the only actual team here so in other words..
Fury: Entregarlas. Hand them over. Now.
Jackman: Well these belts are mine and I get to choose when and where I want to put them on the line. Right now it's no time soon
Wrex: Yeah, that isn’t how this is going to go down. Way I see it you got two options, be smart and find yourself someone who will actually put up with that smell. Or be dumb, act like you hold all the power here. And face the firing squad alone.
Wrex: I couldn’t care less which one you choose, but you will have to choose.
Malu: Wait you get to make decisions around here? Last time I checked there's the little guy in the pink jacket that comes around from time to time and there's me.
Malu: The way I see it Jackman did what he had to do and he's better off for it. He ripped a page right out of my book.
Malu:
Wrex you're going to have to just deal with it. Who know's maybe he'll ask me if I want to add another mark on my resume.
Malu: Or maybe I want to take them myself...
Malu laughs and shakes his head.
Malu: Don't worry I have my own giant Shuggabugga to deal with. But know that I'm always watching.
Malu:
Though I may be a champion, I still run this place. Jackman make your mark and let the noise crash like a wave. Now let's move and get on with my show, my pukka pies are getting cold.
The camera pans to the announce team.
Malu laying down the law!
Scumciety will not be denied!
We turn to a movie theater somewhere in New York. The camera goes deeper inside to find that the locals are having a good time watching another box office smash.
Or so it seems. A young twenty-something man sitting in the middle of the theater is spoiling the fun for everyone. Laughing way too hard at all the mildly funny quips, talking very loudly, and perhaps the greatest sin of all, messing with his phone during the movie. While the screen brightness is turned all the way up.
This doesn't sit well with a particular duo.
The camera turns to show the OCW Women’s Champion Dragana and Johnny Law looking rather annoyed. Johnny takes a piece of popcorn and tosses it at the guy's head.
The popcorn bounces off his dome, causing him to feel his head. He stands up and turns around.
Douche: Excuse me? Who did that?
Johnny wastes no time raising his hand as Dragana puts a hand on her face.
Dragana: ...
Johnny Law: Yeah, that was me.
Douche: What was that for?
Johnny Law: Because you're being an ass and ruining the movie for everyone. You know you're not the only person watching it?
Douche: And you know that this is the 6th time I've watched this damn movie? I'm just trying to have a good time!
Johnny Law: At everyone else's expense.
Douche: Whatever man. I paid for my ticket, I enjoy the movie how I WANT. And you can kiss my ass if you think otherwise, you little masked freak. Your girl's a freak like you too!
The man sits back down as Johnny shakes his head. The disruptive man continues to be a nuisance by laughing and pointing at the screen.
Dragana sighs and shakes her head, looking mildly embarrassed. The pair resumes watching. The Women’s Champion looks down at the loud-mouth, noticing that he’s making fun of her.
Douche: Look at me, I can’t talk!
The man zips up his lips and tries to scream through his closed mouth, looking like a fool in front of his own group of friends. Dragana stands up, walking past several people and toward the foolish man. She stands over him, staring a hole through him.
Douche:(still trying to scream through closed mouth)
The man finally "unzips" his lips and laughs.
Douche: Why don’t you get your mime ass back to your seat?
Dragana looks as if she’s about to do something, but decides against it and starts walking back up the steps. The fool turns back to his friends.
Douche: What a weirdo. Bet she didn’t have any friends growing up. Must’ve been sooooooooo awful being a lone loser like that. FOREVER ALONE.
The Women’s Champion stops walking back up the steps and turns around. She looks at Johnny, who simply nods in her direction. She power walks back down and has a seat next to the troublemaker.
Douche: What, are you going to do somethi-
In an instant, she grabs the man by the jaw, applying immense pressure to the bones and muscles. She closes in on him as he tries to grab her arm to escape.
She looks at the man eye-to-eye, the fool quivering in his shoes. She uses her other hand to put a finger over his mouth.
Dragana: SSSHH!
She then shoves him into the laps of his friends, her expression one of contained rage. She walks back up the steps and sits next to Johnny, who looks slightly concerned.
Johnny: He really struck a nerve with that, huh?
Dragana: …
She simply stared at the screen, barely paying attention to the film at this point. Her gaze drifted off in contemplation. Johnny puts a hand on her shoulder as the scene fades.
The camera pans to the announce team.
That's why you keep your mouth shut!
NO TALKING!
Rust Cohle stands in a small, secluded area. His surroundings give little clues to his whereabouts. He stands, with his head down facing a dark figure. The figure holds his hands together, with his fingers intertwined.
Cohle: ... and he don’t know?
???: Our leader is confident that he’s quite unaware.
Cohle: Good. That hopper is going to wish he never got in my way.
???: Your associate is on board as well? The one with the complex?
Cohle: You let me worry about Quartz. He’ll listen to me.
???: Trusting you two isn’t something the leader wants to take chances on.
Cohle: You can trust me.
Cohle raises his head to the dark figure, who takes a small step towards him menacingly, revealing a set of horns on a bright mask. A black, robe like material hangs down from his body.
???: Heed these words, anything outside of the plan and you will suffer the most dire of consequences.
???: You have been sought out because we have a common enemy. Do not overstep your purpose. The leader has no time to quibble in your menial affairs.
Cohle: You think I have time to worry about what he thinks? I only have one goal tonight…
The figure steps back into the shadows from Cohle. His silhouette still slightly standing out from the darkness behind him. He once again regains his pose, fingers intertwined.
Cohle: You guys give me the creeps, you know that?
???: Do not be late.
The figure steps backwards and disappears amongst the darkness. Cohle walks backwards as well and finds the camera that was looking in on the situation. His face grows frustrated and he marches off mysteriously.
The camera pans to the announce team.
WHO IS THAT!
I DON'T KNOW!
Damian Bourne vs Loki
The camera pans to the announce team.
RIGHT IN THE BREADBASKET!
...............................
Previously Recorded,
A ghoul priest is standing at the altar in front of the attending of Kasstianity mass, behind him two more dressing in black robes sway a gold thurible back in forth letting out scented smoke.
Inside the thurible is supposedly flesh of none other than their lord and savior, their Emperor of everything, Kassidy Hayes.
Ghoul Priest Francis begins the serom with a chant,
Ghoul Priest Francis: Il padre
Ghoul Priest Francis: Il filio
Ghoul Priest Francis: Et lo spiritus malum
Ghoul Priest Francis: Omnis caelestis
Ghoul Priest Francis: Delenda est
The attendance finish with Francis,
Kasstians: Anti Cristus
Kasstians: Il filio de Sathanas
Kasstians: Infestissumam!
Ghoul Priest Francis: We are gathered here today to give worship to our divine one, Kassidy Hayes.
Kasstians: AMEN!
Ghoul Priest Francis: Turn in your Bibles to the first chapter of the book of Job.
Ghoul Priest Francis: I decided tonight we will discuss just how well Kassidy, Jobs people out in the ring every single week and to become more familiar with the word and its true definition.
Ghoul Priest Francis: To Job In professional wrestling is a losing performance in a wrestling match; It is derived from the euphemism "doing one's job". The term can be used a number of ways.
Ghoul Priest Francis: When a wrestler is booked against Kassidy, you already know he is going to do the Job. The act itself is described with the verb jobbing or jobbing out, and while some need to cheat, Kassidy never does so the people that job to him, they got jobbed out cleanly.
Kasstians: AMEN!
Ghoul Priest Francis: Would anyone here like to bring up their favorite jobbing out cleanly to Kassidy?
A woman in the third row stands,
Ghoul Priest Francis: What is your name?
Woman: Heather.
Heather: I remember it like it just happened, without breaking a sweat Kassidy Hayes jobbed out Cort Marshall in what was at the time, one of the shortest matches in OCW. When he hit the turn and it was over, I felt the most satisfied sexually I have ever felt in my life.
She sits and a small child in the sixth row stands up and make his way out to the isle so he can be seen,
Ghoul Priest Francis: And What is your name my child?
Boy: Kassis.
Ghoul Priest Francis: Your parents named you well,
Kassis: The jobbing was on my birthday and it was the best birthday present I could ever ask for.
Kassis:
I was front row when Kassidy Hayes, the sultan of the flipcutter, hit the Night Walkers Sunset on H20, getting the 1, 2, and 3.
Kassis:
The best part came next, when Kassidy beat H20 with a chair, saving us for a few weeks from seeing H20 in the ring.
Kasstians: AMEN!
Kassis makes his way back to his seat along his parents and the next person stands but the camera begins to descends leaving the church hall above and sinking into the depth where underneath the praise above, Kassidy lays in a rejuvenation bath listening to his followers.
