A still shot of several stalls in a bathroom area is shown. The background is clear as something shiny lies in the blurry foreground on a baby changing table. A large family stall is pressed into the corner in the center of the camera shot.
After a few moments, the sound of urination is heard in the background.
Man:Urrghhh. Ahhhh.
The camera slowly tilts down just a bit to see 2 large boots underneath the stall. The right foot is tapping away as the urination continues to hit the toilet bowl.
Man: Why are all these bathrooms hidden? Can't a guy get a private locker room? Yeesh.
Man: It's like they don't even care who comes to these shows? Pft. Doesn't shock me.
As the urination sounds stop, the bathroom door swings open and a woman walks in with a baby, standing in the blurry foreground. After staring for several seconds, the foreground comes into focus; the camera swinging to show only the woman.
She is holding a baby looking down puzzled at the shiny object, which is just off camera.
She reaches down slightly to move the large shiny object out of the way and as she does, the camera moves behind her to show the object as an OCW Riot Tag Team Championship Belt, clumsily thrown on the baby changing station. The crowd pops at the sight of the belt.
Just before her hand touches the belt, the stall door swings open, slamming against the wall and startling the woman. She puts her hand over her chest, catching her gasp.
Woman: Oh! I'm sorry. Is this yours? I just had to... Are you wearing sunglasses?
The camera snaps over to see the man who was in the family stall zipping his fly and adjusting his pants.
Quartz: ...Howdy.
Woman (looking around confused): Uh, I'm sorry sir, is this your sons toy?
Quartz: My son?
Woman: Daughter? I'm sorry you're in the family restroom. I just assumed--
Quartz: Look lady, I couldn't find another place to piss.
The woman looks at Ijitu Quartz annoyed as he smirks at her, smug as ever.
Quartz walks forward and snatches his Championship off of the table childishly and mimics the annoyed look of the woman like a 4 year old.
Quartz: Myeh.
Quartz saunters past the woman and begins to leave.
Woman: Some kid or family could have actually needed that stall you know!
Quartz: Don't make up fat mouth breathing children to try and make me feel bad, lady. I don't take no concessions. Not my style. Hahaaa!
Quartz walks out of the bathroom arrogantly before popping his head quickly back into the bathroom door to yell back at the woman.
Quartz: ... and it's not a gah' damn toy. It's a CHAMPIONSHIP.
Woman:... Honestly, I don't even know why we had to come to this show.
The camera fades.
This could be a good one...
You ready for this one Lee?
Wake me when this is over. *Kicks feet up on the desk, covering his eyes with a cowboy hat.*
Wrex vs The Anime Prince
The camera pans to the announce team.
You alright over there?
He's red in the face.
One-day Wrex… One day I will get cleared and you better start running.
*Sniffle*
B17: Clark, it's...it's...it's ok. I will be fine. Thank you, thank you for checking on me, but I just stubbed my toe.
Clark: Um…. You were just crying uncontrollably and all I asked what your thoughts were on Scumciety attacking Austin Lee?
B17 shakes as he tries to repress the sobs: I hate him…..*sniffle* I'm happy he's getting what he deserves. He...he...made his bed, now he can sleep in it!
Clark: Near the end of the attack, Austin's mic picked up him muttering “help me, B, help me.”
B17 blows his nose: Sorry, Clark. I'm feeling very sick.
Clark: Why didn't you help your former best friend?
B17: He obviously was reaching for and calling out for Billy Ray Cyrus, whom I gave my celebrity of the week ticket to….I know he was! He needed B! But not his B, I MEAN THAT B!
Clark: B17 are you saying that if the unprovoked attacks continue on Austin Lee that you won't attempt to help him?
B17: I, um. It's just, you know? I have The B Community! They are my family now! Austin is no longer my family!
B17's eyes start to tear up.
Clark: Stub your toe again?
B17: Yes!
Clark rolls her eyes: Ok, ok. Look, you’re a blubbering mess and it’s embarrassing. What if I help you find your wig?
B17 sits up straight and his eyes widen: TELL ME HOW?
Clark:.....I’m going to regret this. After Turmoil tonight I will show you the last known location of the wig, ok? Now stop crying.
*****
Someone can be heard talking on a phone in a nearby room behind a closed door. Muffled speaking barely makes it through the door as we only hear half of a conversation. Just as the camera gets close to the door, it swings open and Jackson Montgomery walks out holding a Nextel flip phone to his ear.
Jackson Montgomery: Where are you? I’m here, but I don’t see you! …….. Of course I’ve left the locker room ……… I’m standing just outside catering. Don’t look for me, I’m coming.
Jackson slaps the top of the flip phone down, it emitting that all too familiar clacking sound.
Jackson Montgomery: Sweet Christmas. Jim Black is quite demanding.
Jackson continues down the hallway, high fiving production workers like he’s Michael J. Fox on the set of Teen Wolf. He turns the corner and stops dead in his tracks as he sees someone standing in front of a catering table, reaching over trying to grab a sandwich. Jackson rushes over and grabs the turkey and cheese sandwich and hands it to little person who is barely taller than the table.
Jackson Montgomery: Aries! It’s good to see you old friend.
The vertically challenged man, who can’t be more than 3½’ feet tall, looks up at Jackson with an annoyed look on his face, but then decides to play along.
Lil’ Aries” Hey...you! How’ve you been? It’s been quite some time since we’ve seen one another!
Jackson: That’s true. I think the last time we met, I beat you in a match that involved Trance and [i]maybe B17? Anyway, I look forward to our match tonight little guy!
Lil’ Aries looks annoyed to say the least: Listen here you backwoods pile of crap! Stop calling me little! I’m big in all the right places. Keep mouthing off, and you’ll find out!
Jackson: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Easy litt...uh...fella. I don’t want to see anything other than your ass in the ring! I’ll show you what this backwoods pile of crap can do! Jackson pauses, realizing he just called himself a pile of crap. Anyway, have you seen Trance? I want to hold my Trump case over his head to tease him.
Lil’ Aries huffs and points his thumb over his shoulder, then turns back to the catering table. Jackson slaps him on the back, nearly knocking him down.
Jackson: Thanks little man.
Lil’ Aries has had enough. He tosses his plate in the air and dives on Jackson, grabbing him by the legs and knocking him to the ground. Lil’ Aries crawls up Jackson like a lemur monkey and begins to wail on him. While the punches have no weight behind them, it’s the quickness that catches Jackson off guard. After a few people have gathered around and a few seconds of little punches, Jackson HURLS Lil’ Aries into the air, causing him to crash through the catering table. Food flies everywhere! Jackson gets to his feet and dusts himself off. Upon looking up and seeing what he’d just done and seeing Lil’ Aries covered in pasta salad, Jackson looks at the faces around him.
Jackson: What?! He started it!
Jackson backs away slowly before turning and full on sprinting away from the scene and out of sight.
