Escape Room Employee: Yes, sirs, this be one of the biggest escape rooms in the world. We sure is proud of it, ain’t no one ever escaped. Rumor has it that some people never escape it.
He gives a hefty laugh, befitting of his gut.
Employee: Naw, seriously. We let everyone out after the hour is up. But I gotta tell ya, this room is meant for eight people minimum. I don’t think two gonna cut it…
The camera slowly pans around and reveals The Baron of Bodyslams, Mugen and The World’s Greatest Hunter, Drago Cesar..
Audience cheers can be heard across the PA system.
Drago looks up with concern.
Drago: What that?
Employee: Oh that’s nothing, just a little live stream for a our fans. I hears you two quite famous. Let’s show you the room.
The portly man unlocks a door and push it in. A small room is revealed. An old broken TV sits in the corner, along with an overturned chair. A bookshelf stands against the wall.
Mugen: Old sport, this is it? My Cube is bigger. ‘
Employee: Well now, I guess you just gotta look around and see what you find. I’m gonna lock this door. You have an hour to find the key and return to this door too escape. Good luck!
With that he slams the door shut.
Mugen: Sonofa, I hate when they bang the doors shut.
Drago: How we gonna find key? This don’t look simple.
Mugen: Beyond simple. Drago, move the bookshelf, good sir.
Drago obliges and reveals a secret door.
Mugen: This door looks pathetic. I could have made a bar trap door in my SLEEP.
Drago: How you find code?
Mugen: The code is 5, 23, 11.
Drago: How you know this?
Mugen: The three knobs on the TV all point to a number, absurdly simple!
Drago opens the door steps into another room and flips on the light switch. This room is significantly bigger. A weird array of light bulbs are situation on a switchboard next to a door on the far side. An odd collection of metal bars are situated in a corner with tubing running from the base of the walls to the ceiling. A bed with a manikin is directly in the middle of the room.
Drago suddenly leaps at the bed and delivers a swift kick.
B17: AHHHHHH
Drago: AIUUUUGHHHHHH
Mugen: YAHTZEE!
Drago: I think you mean bingo.
Mugen: Bango?
Drago: Bongo.
Mugen: Congo?
Drago: Congo Bongo.
Mugen: Boingo?
Drago: Oingo Boingo.
B17 stumbles towards Mugen & Drago and try to come in for a hug to which neither oblige due to the smell.
Drago: What you do here?
Mugen: He must be an employee who jumps out at us like at a haunted house. I GET IT.
B17: Guys its me! B17!
Mugen takes a good look at B17 up and down thinking carefully. A moment comes over him as he reaches over to the lightswitch to turn off the light and turn it back on.
Mugen: Ah! B17! How are you old sport?
B17: I’ve….seen better days.
Drago: How you here before us? You work here?
B17: No, I just…..have been here…..for a while.
Mugen: And just how long would that be?
Drago: They supposed to let you out after some time right? And tell you answer or something?
B17: They didn’t let me out. Code Jackman paid them with STOLEN B COMMUNITY MONEY!
Drago looks sympathetic, but Mugen’s face stiffens.
Mugen: If Code has your B Community Money, what money is going to my income funnel?
B17: Oh, yeah. I’m a little light this month.
Mugen digs into his pocket and whips out a long scroll of parchment.
Drago watches as the scroll rolls to the other side of the room.
Mugen: Observe subsection 17, and it states “67 percent of of total revenue, including merchandise, salary, and supplemental incomes of B17 are to be distributed to Mugen’s Income Funnel.”
B17 cocks his eyebrow: Didn’t we amend that percentage in subsection 29?
Mugen checks: Right, it’s supposed to be 79 percent.
B17: Sounds right.
Mugen snaps the parchment back up: Yet 79 percent of 0 revenue is unacceptable!
B17: Well technically I am still paying you 79 percent…
Mugen: 79 PERCENT OF 0 IS STILL 0.
Drago: Quick maths.
Mugen pokes B17 in the chest with his pinky finger.
Mugen: I have a solution that will benefit both of us.
Bingo: And that is?
Mugen: You need money, so I can be paid.
Bingo: And so I can…
Mugen: And I haven’t been in competition in some time and I need to keep myself limber. How about it, old sport. A match between you and I?
Bingo: Uhhh, I guess so sure.
Mugen: BUT I NEED THE OLD BINGO!
B17: Hmmmmm. The old Bingo, you say? Hmmmm.
Drago makes Bingo and Mugen move their hands towards each other for a handshake and starts moving their hands up and down for them.
The camera pans to the announce team.
ARE YOU SERIOUS???!!!
HE CAN'T! HE WON'T!
The Xtron Flickers On!
The scene opens backstage with both members of the Uncrowned at their designated spots in the Turmoil rookie locker room, shoddily marked by a laminated piece of paper stuck on the wall labelled ‘Uncrowned’.
Preparing for the biggest match of their careers so far against the current OCW Tag Team Champions, CQC, has clearly taken its toll as the rookie pairing go out of their way to do just about anything apart from sitting down and getting ready.
Doc appears somewhat agitated, as he feels his trouser pockets up and down, and then up his chest and down his arms, before quickly checking his suitcase and then under the bench before huffing and then turning to his tag partner, Antonio Everrett, whose otherwise occupied by his phone.
Doc: Shit, man. I think I left my water bottle in the car. Ev, could you be an absolute star and go and grab it for me?
Everrett, half-listening, keeps his eyes on the screen, tip-tapping away as he responds.
Everrett: Uh,... yeah, yeah, I will. Just give me a second, I’m uh,... just finishing up, aaaand-
Doc grabs his arm and turns it towards him, so that both he and Everrett can see the phone.
Everrett: Oi!
Doc: Hold on, is that-
Everrett uses his free hand to put his index finger to Docs’ lips.
Everrett: Shh, shh, shh, shh.
Ear to ear smiles break out on both of the Uncrowned boys. Doc throws an arm over Ant’s shoulder, before taking his phone and having a scroll through the IG feed of the damsel in question that Everrett seemed to be messaging.
Doc: No way. What black magic must you have been working with to make these kind of moves, hmm? You the prince of the DMs now, or something?
Everrett throws his arms in the air and holds a shrug.
Everrett: What can I say? I’m a man of the people.
Doc and Ant laugh together before exchanging a polite handshake, transforming into their usual handshake. Before long, Doc quickly remembers the favour he asked.
Doc: Oh yeah, my bottle. Pretty please? Let me get ahead on preparing for the champs then. Big night ahead of us, yeah?
Everrett: Absolutely, man. No margin for error against those CQC boys. Tonight, we go out there and back up all that shit we talked the other week, no questions asked. Oh yeah, your bottle, let me just go and get it now, see you in a minute.
Doc: Take care, bro. See you on the other side!
Everrett laughs and turns to exit, princess waving in the doorway before leaving and shutting the door behind him.
As he begins to make his way down the corridor, Ant’s mind begins to wander. Are Uncrowned really ready to grab the bull by the horns and rise up to the challenge of TTT’s newest acquisitions?
How bad is the egg on their faces going to be if they do lose? And will they be able to handle said egg in the best way possible and bounce back?
All things considered, CQC are undoubtedly the top dogs in the Riot tag division, with both Cohle and Quartz joining the ‘Beat Drago Club’ recently at Devil’s Night.
All this self doubt failed to make Antonio realise the presence of a man following him down the corridor. This would be Coolidge, son of K.D Angelo, who’s been searching for a fight with Doc Green for weeks now, and decides to take this opportunity to attack Everrett from behind.
Coolidge ambushes Antonio, smashing a chair into his back before shouting at the OCW rookie, who is stunned on the ground from the sudden attack.
Coolidge: Missed me, huh!? Don’t think I forgot about my opportunity, with you messing around with the champs and all.
Coolidge: You really thought you could be a hero, didn’t you? I’d love to see you go out there tonight and perform in front of your ‘adoring fans’. Let’s see your dumbass friend ignore me for some third rate champs without his partner. How that feel by the way, poor kitten?
With Coolidge’s shouting and Antonio’s cry in agony, the commotion is overheard and two men come rushing in to interject…
???: Hey!
Coolidge turns to see none other than Rust Cohle and Ijitu Quartz, who jog into the fray and stand between Antonio and Coolidge, seeming to protect him, title belts in hand.
Rust: Hey tough guy?! This is our opponent for tonight! You can’t just go ambushing people in the back area.
Coolidge stands tense at the tag team champions as Antonio works his way back to his feet, shocked by sight of CQC coming to his aid.
Quartz: Yeah…
Without warning, Quartz swings back around and smashes Everrett with the Riot Tag Team Championship belt.
Quartz: ...Not without letting us know first.
Quartz looks back up to Coolidge, standing over Antonio Everrett and gestures back towards Coolidge, who is now brandishing the steel chair by one of the legs.
Quartz: Go ahead, do what you gotta do. We’re done with this rookie clown.
Everrett: Ah! You pricks!
CQC laugh as they walk by the two men and out of sight.
Focusing his offence on his left arm, he repeatedly hits the shoulder with the curved edge of the chair, and then viciously swinging the arm into an equipment box.
Everrett writhes in agony on the floor, clutching his left arm as Doc rushes over from the rookie locker room. Coolidge is still there, holding his arms up as if he had nothing to do with it while smiling and laughing.
Coolidge: Aww, I guess your friend might not be able to compete tonight, and on the biggest night of your careers? What a shame. Unless you just think you have it in you to get it done without a backup plan, that’s what you’re all about after all, Doc.
Doc ignores this statement from Coolidge as he walks away arrogantly, before beginning to tend to the damage on Everrett’s arm and calling for help from on-site staff.
Doc: Holy shit, man. You alright?
Everrett: What does it look like, mate? It bloody hurts a bastard, but trust me, this is nothing, we both need to compete tonight. There is no way we are letting this opportunity slip, CQC are going to get it tonight. They were here too you know, I should’ve known that they’d clock me over the head with their belts the minute they stood beside me.
Doc: You competing? Yeah, that’s not happening. It was my fault you got hurt, bro. I’m no expert but there is no way you’re fighting on that arm. I got this, I’ll show CQC that they messed with the wrong lads, you’re going to get this tended to.
The scene ends with Doc and a member of staff helping Everrett to the medical room before running off to go and finish getting ready for his match against the tag champions, seemingly two-on-one with Everrett held in the medical room.
The camera pans to the announce team.
This isn't good.
No..no it is not!
The scene opens up before Code Jackman's match as he is talking to the press.
Reporter #1: Mr. Jackman what have you been doing over the break since you were victorious over B-17?
Jackman: To be very honest, I have been relaxing soaking in the glory of defeating that B-17 and trying to take control I mean charge over the B community.
Reporter #2: What do you think of your opponent tonight Keith Hendrix?
Jackman: I never heard of him? Wait a second is he that one guy? Looks flamboyant?
Reporter #2: What preparations have you done for this match then?
Jackman: What preparations? The only preparations I need is to make sure B-17 doesn't come out there during my match. I know he is in this building and I don’t need him to come out during my beat down.
Reporter #1: Even after beating B-17 at Devils Night you still seem worried that he is going to do something?
Jackman shakes his head and begins to laugh.
Jackman: Do you think I am worried about him? I am 100% better than B-17 he is not in my head.
Reporter #3: You do realize your music is playing for you to go out there? You haven’t even changed yet.
Jackman: Oh crap I guess when you show up 5 minutes before your match and talk to idiots like you guys you don’t have time to change or stretch.
Jackman begins to strip down to his ring gear.
Jackman: By the way, I have a message for B-17 tonight.
The scene ends as it goes right into the match.
CODE JACKMAN vs KEITH HENDRIX
The camera pans to the announce team.
What a manuver!
Right in the bread basket!
Walking confidently into frame is Dennis Dillinger, swinging his arms at his sides. He looks down at his grey suit and tries to prep it, removing small cotton balls and brushing it with the back of his hand.
Dillinger: Aheh, maybe a change of color will open up some wallets.
Dillinger looks down at his tie, which is usually a crisp red color, now changed to a light blue color to pander to the Brooklyn Turmoil crowd.
Dillinger: Ah!
The capitalist goon holds his hand up with one finger in the air as if he remembered something before digging his opposite hand into his jacket pocket and pulling out a CD Case we have seen before. The artwork on the front is covered in purple smoke and a dark figure on the front.
Dillinger makes a disgusted face looking down at it and shakes his head.
Dillinger: “Tayy Wayy”? I wonder if that idiot really knows how that word is spelled? Who am I kidding? Ahahaha!
He rears his head back in laughter, insulting Tayy Breizee’s album, which he has full rights to.
Dillinger continues to walk down the thinning hallway, the curtain is shown as a smile wipes across his face. He seems to be on his way to the ring to speak to the OCW Universe about the Tayy Breizee campaign.
Dillinger: The blue show debut. Talk about brand expansion! Ahahah!
The camera follows behind Dillinger as he makes his way to the curtain. An OCW crew member stands with a headset on holding a clipboard as the greasy agent makes his way to the curtain.
Dillinger: Comin’ through, kid.
The crew member blocks Dillinger’s path with the clipboard and nervously looks up to the tall man to break the bad news.
OCW Crewman: Ah - Sir y-- you can’t go to the ring right now.
Dillinger: What? I SPECIFICALLY told those damn producers I would be coming at this time. I’m going out there!
Dillinger tries to push through but the young crewman denies him again. Dillinger grows frustrated and lashes out.
Dillinger: Kid! You lay a hand on me again and I’ll take EVERYTHING you own, everything ya’ momma owns, and everything ya’ daddy left ya’ momma when he found out you were being born!
OCW Crewman: Mr.. Dillinger? Yeah you.. You cancelled before the show. The slot has been fil.. It’s - you know, someone else is going -
Dillinger: WHAT!? I did not cancel you snot nosed little -
His rage is interrupted by the sounds of high pitched humming from behind the curtain.
Dillinger: ...That’s… GrrrRRRRRR.
Dillinger starts to scowl with anger as the crewman tells him what he’s already figured out.
OCW Crewman: Your associate Tayy Breizee told me…
Tayy Breizee’s proud humming gets louder as he swings the curtain open wide and stands in front with his arms crossed, humming passionately at Dillinger, which only further serves to anger him.
Dillinger: I… am… going… to…
Tayy: Whatchu’ gonna do, Denny? I knew your bodyguard wasn’t gon’ be here. So I took it upon myself to clear up your schedule.
The OCW crewman backs away out of view, confused at the situation and nervous he’s done something wrong.
Tayy: You know, I think I figured it out. I think ya’ boy wants to be just like me. Yeaaah, that all makes sense!
Tayy laughs to himself and buckles over sarcastically pointing at Dillinger, who is silently seething with rage.
Tayy: That’s why he so mad all the time, D. He wanna be Tayylos but he just Tayylose. He wants to be Tayy Tayy, but he just wack. He knows it too. That’s why he’s all dark and pissy all the time.
Dillinger: If you don’t get out of my way, I’m going to GET you out of my way. This protection order only goes one way, you know.
Dillinger grins and leans into Tayy threateningly, although his adversary does not budge and instead leans back on a nearby wall away from the curtain, appearing to move out of Dillinger’s way.
Tayy: Yeah, you’re right.
Dillinger perks his nose up and grabs his lapels, before walking towards the curtain.
Tayy: … but you know, I can’t touch ya'...
Dillinger's hand grabs the curtain, but it yanks open before he can do it himself. He stands stunned and confused at what he's looking at.
Tayy points his finger at the figure, and looks over at his disgraced former agent.
Tayy: ...but he can.
The camera flips open to see OCW manly man and heavy lifter… Natolie Joe!
Joe is standing with his arm flexed on his hip, looking as fit as ever as the other hand holds open the curtain.
Dillinger backs away from the curtain and steps back to look at both of em.
Tayy looks over at Joe and shakes his head while laughing to himself.
Tayy: Aye’ man, if you want that protein shake, you know what to do.
Joe flexes with excitement and chases after the retreating Dillinger:
Dillinger: Agh!!
The scene ends with Joe toying with Dillinger and chasing him away back down the hall as Tayy stands up off the wall and hands the OCW Crewman a $20.
Tayy: Maan, that was too good. Thanks bro.
The camera pans to the announce team.
Haha!
GOT EM!
The Camera Pans To The Ramp!
Alyssa Winters: Good evening, neckbeards.
Alyssa Winters: My name is Alyssa Winters. Most of you know me already.
Alyssa Winters: I'm a Twitch Streamer. A pretty popular one, too. I am the very best OCW 2K19 player in the world and tonight, I'm here to officially join the Turmoil women's division.
Alyssa Winters: Why, you might ask?
Alyssa Winters: Every Youtuber, every Streamer, every Instagram model is cursed. They know they are going to reach their peak of popularity one day or another and from that moment onwards… well, it's just a slow downfall to oblivion.
Alyssa Winters: I reached that peak. And I'm not going to just stand there and watch helplessly as my sub counts plummets. Hell no!
Alyssa Winters: I am here because I need this stage, I need this spotlight!
Alyssa Winters: This way, you sweaty nerds are going to remember me, you are going to fall in love with me… because I am a girl and I play VideoGames! You HAVE to worship me because of this!
Alyssa Winters: And then, once the show is over, once you are back in your moms’ basements, you will subscribe to my channel, donate to my Patreon and you will be staring at your monitor as I play some of those stupid RPGs nobody plays anymore! Ah!
The crowd reaction is mixed. Most are booing, others are laughing.
Alyssa Winters: Now, there's one more thing I have to say before leaving.
Alyssa Winters: There’s a hippy around here, spreading lies and fake smiles in OCW.
Alyssa points at a sign with Terra’s name on it
Alyssa Winters: Terra Daturas.
Alyssa Winters: I know you are in the back somewhere… why don’t you come out here real quick?
Several tense moments pass as the crowd is surprised at the sudden call out.
Alyssa Winters: Awh, no luck? What’s the matter? Still moping around because of…
The Camera Pans To The Ramp!
Winters is interrupted by the sound of Terra’s theme blasting through the arena.
Terra Daturas come out with a wide smile, this time without her usual oversized faux-fur love coat. Instead donning a loose fitting pink shirt with new monikers embroidered on the front and a large flower in her ear.
The shirt reads #ShowLove and #TerraRising on the front, with a large heart on the back.
Terra waves to the OCW crowd before picking up the microphone but as soon as she is about to speak, Alyssa interrupts her.
Alyssa Winters: Perhaps I wasn’t clear. I am the one who has something to say, not you. So, hush.
Terra’s smile fades a bit, still surprised at the call out, she gives her instigator a slightly concerned look, complete with wide puppy dog eyes.
Alyssa Winters: I am going to ask you something very simple and straightforward, Terra…
Alyssa gets close to her and looks Terra in the eyes
Alyssa Winters: You sure like to act all cute and innocent, a Valkyrie 2.0 some say, but...
Alyssa Winters: ...do you have a clear conscience?
Terra: Perfection only lies in 1 woman, Ms. Winters. That beautiful presence that guides us and nurtures us. The one that has done so since the dawn of time.
Terra:Mater Natura… Us human beings are not perfect. We harm this gift we were given in all sorts of ways every single day.
Terra: ...but I try my very best to show love and kindness to all people… even those that show disregard for harming our planet. Even those who are unkind to others.
Terra: Everyone on our earth deserves love and I will continue to try and do whatever I can to make our blissful land a better one by trying to heal the misguided hearts here and around the world.
Terra: … I am not perfect… but I can rest happy each night knowing I’m doing my very best to make it so. Conatus, Ms. Winters. It means-
Alyssa Winters: AUGH. enough already. I don’t care what it means, you weirdo.
Alyssa Winters: I cannot believe what you just said… it’s so stupid!
Alyssa Winters: You say you are trying your best to show love and kindness? Really? All I see is a fraud who keeps sticking her nose where she doesn’t belong.
Alyssa Winters: If this was Twitch, I would’ve banned you already from my stream. That’s right: no more chat for you!
Alyssa Winters: I’m going to ask you again, Terra…
Alyssa Winters: Think about everything you’ve said and done this season. Think about it.
Alyssa Winters: Do you honestly believe you have a clear conscience?
Terra looks back at Alyssa and smiles to her before nodding her head.
Alyssa: Well!?
Terra gently places her microphone on the ground and shakes her head with her hands innocently behind her back.
Alyssa Winters: Oh great!
Alyssa tries to pass Terra her own microphone, shouting angrily at her... but she again shakes her head and continues smiling at Alyssa.
After several tense moments, Terra opens her arms wide seemingly asking for a hug.
Alyssa then shouts something to the crowd. It’s impossible to hear what she says though.
She then pushes Terra away and leaves the ring, continuing to shout towards Terra inside the ring as the fans are staring at the two in disbelief.
The camera pans to the announce team.
LOVE CONQUERS ALL!
Word!
The Xtron Flickers On!
PREVIOUSLY RECORDED
The sounds of wrestlers rebounding off ropes and bodies being slammed onto the mat could be heard as the camera panned to the inside of the OCW performance center where Damian Bourne and Benjamin Moore would be practicing moves inside of a ring.
After Moore hitting his signature neckbreaker “The Drip Drop”, the two would stand up to rest and drink refreshments. While Damian would drink from his Gatorade squeeze bottle, Benjamin would angrily check his Rolex as if he had a scheduled appointment
Damian: If I take another damn bump without Asher being here I swear I’ll lose my shit. We’ve been practicing for about two hours and he was supposed to be here an hour ago.
Benjamin: “Ja, Him got me waiting here with you for two hours as if he's the important one. We are the wrestlers..he's the rookie. We should not be here at his leisure! Who him tink he is?!”
Shaking his head in disappointment, Bourne would attempt to take a drink of his Gatorade but the only thing that would come out the bottle was air. Frustrated that Asher had still not arrived Damian would throw the empty bottle out of the ring and grab his towel.
Looking down and taking hold of his gucci training bag Benjamin would follow suit and starts to also exit the ring alongside Damian but they would both hesitate as the sounds of footsteps could be heard walking towards them. As they looked over, the pink haired rookie would open his mouth and speak with a mellow mellifluous voice.
Asher: Hey guys, sorry I'm late. My Uber didn't show up, so I tried taking a Lyft, and when that guy didn't show up I had to take a cab and you already know how long they take to get here especially when I live on the other side of town.
Bourne would look at Benji and then back at Asher with a disappointed look on his face. Picking up his bottle, he would begin to walk towards the showers with his back turned on the two.
Benjamin: “Excuses?! That's what you bring to me? Huh, you bumbo!”
Once jumping down from the ring Benjamin would look Asher up and down in a judgmental manner as he to proceeded to exit the area
Benjamin: “Yu got a lot to learn boi..time is precious and more valid den whatever excuse you bring to me. Next time yu wanna come to a practice that you asked for late, Mi gonna make sure you never enter the ring with me.”
Asher would rush over and run in front of Benji and Damian and try and stop them while making sure not to trip himself.
Asher: Come on guys please. It won't happen again I swear. I was late. Everybody has their off days. Just give me like 30 minutes tops. Please?
Benjamin: “What do yu think Damian? Him worth our time or should him stay and regret his first impression of himself?”
Damian: I’m sure there’s some way he can make up an hour of our precious wasted time. Who would’ve thought that a rookie who hasn’t even had thirty minutes of screen time would hold up some experienced wrestlers such as ourselves. How does one thousand crunches sound Benji? Ten second breaks for every one hundred.
Benjamin: “Mi think that'd be to easy, Have him help set up the ring for next week's show. He's gonna feel that in dah morning.”
Damian would chuckle for a little bit and put down his bag to extend out his hand.
Damian: You cool with that rookie? Setting up the ring for the next five weeks would be worth it, especially for the lessons we’ll be giving you.
Asher take a sigh of relief as he shook Damian’s hand.
Asher: Sounds great. Thank you. I really appreciate it. I don't know if you guys have noticed but wrestling really isn't my strong suit. I just learnt the basics when I got signed. I mostly practiced Muai Thai.
Damian: Great, just the answer I was looking for. I’m sure Benjamin will fill you in on what you’ll be doing, but for now I’m gonna go grab some fresh towels and refill the Gatorade bottles.
Benjamin: “We're gonna start with a bit of speech work. Just from talking to yu now mi can tell yah need it. Then both Damian and I is gonna help clean up your moves then teach yu about ring awareness.”
A few minutes would pass until Damian arrived back at the ring with refilled drinks and fresh towels. Removing his from around his neck, he would enter the ring along with the other two men. Picking up a microphone off the mat and handing it to Asher as the camera panned out and the screen faded to black.
