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The scene opens with a figure perched high ontop of some backstage scaffolding, with an elongated spyglass focused on the OMG locker room, as the camera zooms in on the Xtron, the audience realize that the man perched in the darkness is none other than the Legend of Cut-Throat, in one hand he has his spyglass, with his gaze locked firmly on the door, and in his other hand he is holding 3 ropes, which are all attached to the ceiling by a make-shift pulley system, his trusty sack is laid down beside him.
He minimizes the spyglass and places it in his pocket and turn to speak to the sack.
Cut-Throat : This be it! Any moment now she be sailing through here, and this be where we take here down...this place be the final resting place of the 'HMS Matsuda'.
Cut-Throat : No ye won't be getting 50% of me haul, this be my glory! The gold..the glory..and more importantly, the rum, be mine!
He leans in closer to the sack, listening intently.
Cut-Throat : Yes there be some rum left, and no it won't be crossing your lips on this day!
He pulls a small, glass winchester flask out of his pocket, unpops the cork from the neck, and takes a swig.
Cut-throat : Nothing on this planet be finer than good rum and a good wench.
As he is placing the flask back in his pocket, his foot slips and he accidentally nudges the sack, and it slowly falls from the scaffolding and lands on the ground with a thud.
Cut-Throat [shouting] : YE SEE WHAT YE MADE ME DO NOW!!
Just then, the OMG locker room door opens and out walks the HMS Matsuda, her magnificent black sails glistening in the breeze,Cut-Throat is so focused on his sack, he rushes to action as HMS Matsuda starts down the corridor away from where he is perched.
Cut-Throat [shouting] : THAR SHE BLOWS!!! RELEASE THE KRAKEN!!!
Matsuda begins to turn around to see what all the commotion is about, before he is fully turned, Cut-Throat yanks hard on one of the ropes, and a large bucket which had been suspended on the ceiling flips, pouring a concoction of sushi, fish guts,jelly fish and a dead octopus all over the HMS Matsuda, who lets out a blood curdling scream after being covered in the bloody, lumpy fluid.
Before the scream is finished, Cut-Throat yanks another rope, this time a giant white sheet drops from the ceiling and covers the HMS Matsuda, who is completely disorientated and begins to struggle to get free.
Cut-Throat : DOWN TO THE DEPTHS YE GO YE SEA DEVIL!! PREPARE TO BOARD!!!!
Cut-Throat grabs the last remaining rope firmly in both hands, and takes a step back, he then takes a running step off the front of the scaffolding and swings down the corridor, screaming as he goes.
Cut-Throat [screaming] : HOIST THE COLORS!!!!!
He crashes hard into Matsuda, wrapping himself around him as they both tumble to the floor, rolling through the mixture of blood and fish guts making the floor a slippery death trap.
He wraps his legs tight around the waist and locks his legs in a triangle position and begins to ride the HMS Matsuda like a rodeo bull, whirling his right arm in the air like a lasso motion.
Cut-Throat : Ye are doomed!! Doomed I tell ye!
Matsuda struggles back to his feet, cut-throat still on his back, he starts to try and ram himself backwards into the wall to shake the deranged lunatic off him.
Cut-Throat : Ye will never shake me!! Cut-Throat once held onto a bucking bronco for over 4 minutes using only me teeth!!! The Legend continues!!!
Cut-Throat reaches into his pocket and pulls out the glass winchester flask again, he smashes it hard over Matsuda's head, causing him to drop to one knee and then hard to the ground as glass and rum spray in every direction.
Cut-Throat : Down to the depths with ye!! Where be the gold?? Show me the bounty!!!
He releases the grip with his legs and starts to scramble around the area, looking for his treasure, just then, after hearing all the commotion in the hallway, Matsuda pokes his head out of the OMG doorway to see what all the fuss is about, he is greeted with the site of a pirate, covered in fish guts and blood, on all fours, frantically scurrying around the ground, and a dazed figure covered in a blood soaked sheet lying on the ground, the entire hallway looking like a murder scene.
He makes eye contact with Cut-Throat who instantly stops what he's doing as a look of confusing crosses his face, Matsuda furrows his brow as if to say 'I don't even want to know' and then goes back inside and shuts the OMG locker room door.
Cut-Throat is on his knees in stunned silence staring at the closed door, he turns to face the sack.
Cut-Throat : If the HMS Matsuda be docked in there..then who did we just sink?
He turns to face the downed figure and is greeted with a swift boot which catches him square in the jaw, knocking him to the ground, he looks on as the figure staggers to their feet and yanks the sheet off their head, he is greeted with a bleeding, hysterical screaming woman, covered in fish guts and blood, stinking of rum.
Woman [screaming] : YOU F**KING LUNATIC..WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING??
Woman : HELP!! POLICE!! SECURITY!! HELP!! HELP!!
Cut-Throat scrambles backwards towards the sack, he grabs it in both hands and hops to his feet, looking each way down the corridor checking for security.
Woman : THAT'S IT!! I QUIT!! I DON'T NEED THIS CRAP...$6 an hour ISN'T WORTH IT!! IT'S BAD ENOUGH I HAVE TO HAND CONDITION EACH INDIVIDUAL STRAND OF THAT FREAKS HAIR!! [she points towards the OMG locker room], OR THAT I HAVE TO IGNORE TIBERIUS'S REQUESTS FOR ME TO PLAY 'HIDE THE BETTERNESS'!! BUT NOW I'M GETTING ASSAULTED BY A GROWN MAN DRESSED AS A PIRATE!!!
Woman : AND WHAT THE HELL AM I COVERED IN!??!! [She wipes something off her cheek] OH MY GODD!! IS THAT A FISH EYE!!
She begins to heave, on the verge of vomiting against the wall.
She snorts hard from her nose and a piece of octopus flies out from her left nostril, this again sends her hysterical.
Woman : I QUIT!! I QUIT!!! WHAT DO YOU WANT YOU FREAK??!!!! WHY ARE YOU JUST STOOD THERE STARING??
She begins to stamp her feet and flaps her arms up and down with clenched fists.
Woman : SECURITY!!! SECURITY!!!!
Cut-Throat is still stood frozen to the spot, holding his sack over his shoulder, he slowly starts taking small steps backwards, dragging his feet along the ground, almost moonwalking.
Woman : WHERE ARE YOU GOING!!??!! ANSWER ME!!
He disappears around the corner out of sight of the woman, leaving her stood there in silence, waiting for security, looking like an extra from the set of Dexter.
Cut-Throat pops his head around the corner.
Cut-Throat : Ye owe me a flask of rum! HOIST THE COLORS!!
He vanishes around the corner again and his footsteps can be heard running into the distance as the scene fades with the woman again becoming hysterical.
C4 vs Cody Storm (C) / Tobin Frost
PAGE 6!
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