The Camera pans back to ringside.
The Camera pans to the announce team!
Woah! |
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What the hell |
The scene takes place at yet another undisclosed location, probably a hallway backstage. The camera focuses on the face of Drago as he looks quite excited to announce something....special.
Drago Cesar: Hello, and welcome to special edition of Drago Cesar's Beastly Adventures! Tonight is very special for me, as I will prepare to go to the Air Conditioning Cobra, restrain him, and finally capture him for world to see! After this, then I will bring him back to natural habitat, where he can finally be free among his cobra friends! Are you ready, people?
Cameraman: This is it, Drago, your Wrestlution moment! You got this.
Suddenly it cuts to a montage of Drago Cesar equipping himself with the finest of non-lethal weaponry, sleeping darts, a tranquilizer rifle, a brand new, shiny net, and all sorts of things until finally Drago wraps a headband around his head until he is suddenly interrupted by his cameraman.
Cameraman: W-wait a minute.
Drago Cesar: What? What is problem this time?
Cameraman: I appreciate the fact that you're preparing against that Cobra guy, but why the headband?
Drago Cesar: What is wrong with headband? Make me look like cool dude!
Cameraman: It's awfully cheesy, this isn't the 80s anymore, Drago.
Drago's eyes widen, and he raises his hands, feigning that he's afraid.
Drago Cesar: Oooooh, is cheesy, so people be laugh, right? Oh ok, Mister Johnny Law, guess I have to take this off!
Drago takes off the headband and tosses it away.
Cameraman: .....That's not my name, Drago.
Drago Cesar: It is now. No choice. I'm sorry.
Johnny Law: You're a real pain in the ass sometimes, Drago.
Drago Cesar: I know!
Drago walks off to go get ready for his match as the feed fades to black.
The Camera pans to the announce team!
The Grand Hunt is almost upon us! |
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You are entirely way to excited for that! |
The camera pans into a backstage locker room Illuminati is wearing his striped referee shirt and looking pensively into his locker. The camera pans once again, this time over his shoulder, there is an assortment of various bow ties hung up inside ranging from solid colored, polka-dotted, striped, various animal prints, as well as a number of other patterns. The camera man turns around, reacting to an unseen tap on his shoulder, when he turns Illuminati is standing right behind him.
ILLUMINATI: BOO
The camera fades to static
The Camera pans to the announce team!
NATI |
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NATI
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A few tailgaters and stragglers are in for quite a spectacle. Slowly lowering towards the large lawn across from the even larger parking area, is a golden hot air balloon. It's basket is carrying what looks like two people, one with a unmistakable blond curl.
Another golden streak races across the parking lot dodging cars and nearly missing pedestrians. Stein and Igor, the OMG BOLD Droogs are driving a custom made buggy golf cart hybrid (eco-friendly) at max speed towards the balloon.
Fans and tailgaters also rush towards the mysterious golden balloon forming a semi circle just as it touches down. Tiberius Octavius Dupree immediately climbs out the basket. What spectators thought was a second passenger was instead a cardboard FatHead cut out of his arch-nemesis Hideto Matsuda.
He grabs the SudaFatHead after climbing out, standing him up next to him. Just then Stein and Igor pull up in the golden buggy. They unfold the backseats from the trunk compartment, Tibby puts SudaFatHead in the seat next to him and they speed off. The small security camera on the rear view picks up Tibby's conversing with the cardboard cut out.
Dupree: Today is a beautiful day, Wrestlution Sunday...
Tibby looks at SudaFatHead as if waiting for a reply.
Dupree: I wish the real Matsuda was this quiet. Then again I probably would have ripped your head off and set it on fire if you started talking when I stole you from that ugly lady who was fondling you.
The Droogs look at each other then Tibby as if Bedlam isn't just as crazy.
Dupree: Even though when we get to the locker room I'm going to teach you the same lesson I plan to teach the real mongoloid Matsuda tonight...
The camera fades just as the squadron of OMG BOLD pull into the interior parking garage.
The Camera pans to the announce team!
Sometimes I have words, but most times I do not. |
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I want one of thos SUDAFATHEADS |
You would, but no time for artificially fabricated matsuda's it's time for the Rush match! |
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A Psycho a Ginger, a Guy, and a Rebelutionary, this is going to be interesting. |
He's done it! |
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What a hat trick! |
The screen goes black as he leans in and blows out the flame, the screen fades as the sound of metal screeching into the distance fills the arena.
We find ourselves watching a pre-recorded segment shot on location at Jacobs Falls, Calfornia. It's a lovely spring morning and the birds are singing in the trees. Women and children can be seen being ushered out of the complex into minibuses, a few police motorcycles are in the area. The busses load up as Jacob walks from the gate of his safe haven, beyond the police cordon is a mob, gathered to protest what they perceive as a cult.
A few signs depict Jacob as the devil, others make reference to various cults which have committed numerous attrocities and torn apart communities in the Cali area. The busses start up as Jacob is flanked by his cronies, Eli and Sid Harrison.
Trance: You people point fingers and fear what you don't understand, once, we feared the stars, we feared the moon and worshipped the sun... Now that's changed, it's primeval history. Now we appreciate the beauty of what we once feared, so too shall you come to love me, my family and my brethren.
From the crowd comes, of all things, a tomato which connects squarely with Eli's forehead but he barely registers it as police huckle away the perpetrator.
Trance: See? I stand here before you humble, unarmed to engage in open dialogue but yet you turn to violence, the very violence you claim I breed and instil in the minds of children... In the minds of those that put their faith in me...
Someone in the audience shouts "you're not a god, you're a bastard!"
Trance chuckles.
Trance: I do not claim to be God, but if so many believe it then perhaps it may be so... What is God, but a father? And that's what I am to those who seek shelter from the evils of this sick world. I am their protector, their shelter and father!
Jacob motions, causing Sid and Eli to board a bus. He moves towards the police cordon and with a nod he instructs the officers to stand aside. With arms outstretched he wanders into the hostile crowd.
Trance: I walk amongst those that would seek to destroy me, without fear... I am not an arrogant man, I wish no ill upon any of you here today, nor to those who I must wrestle. My message is peace, peace is what you people want... SO I ASK, nay... I PLEAD that you hear my message, that you give it a chance... If you try and it's not for you... Then there shall be no repercussions, but I can and will better your life...
Trance trails off and the crowd mutter as he turns and exits the mass of humanity to board the bus. He turns and smiles I the audience as slowly a few of their ranks shuffle forward despite disapproving looks from their former comrades and board.
The parking brakes are disengaged and the motorcade begins it's journey down from the hills towards the Golden Gate Bridge, the camera pans backwards towards the dissident crowd as it fades.
The Camera pans to the announce team!
Trance dispensing that Kool-Aid. |
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It's all a means to an end. |
The scene opens up backstage where we find the Lord of the Lariat, Mugen, inexplicably testing his luck by standing under a ladder and warming up. The One Man Revolution Bobby Minio suddenly comes into the scene as he is contemplating for his Last Man Standing match with Cut-Throat. His thought process comes to a halt as he notices Mugen's positioning.
Minio: You know that's bad luck right?
Mugen: I'm not superstitious like that. You look like a mess by the way.
Minio: Well, I haven't exactly slept the past few nights. I'm just thinking about all the ways I want to destroy that ridiculous pirate.
Mugen: Just do what I do. Win.
Minio laughs at the comment as he takes a seat next to Mugen.
Minio: Tell me, what's your plan tonight for your match?
And with that, another familiar voice is heard off camera.
???: His plan is to win.
The cameras turn to find that it is the North American Champion Pugh to complete the C4 meeting here.
Pugh: Your plan is to win. My plan is to win. We will all win tonight and take control of this wretched company. Now, Mugen, I need you for something right now.
Mugen: Don't you see me preparing for my own match. I have better things to take care of.
Pugh: Just remember, I won't forget this the next time you ask me for a favor.
Mugen: Whatever man.
Pugh walks away just as quickly as he showed up.
Minio: What's up with you and him?
Mugen: I need to handle my business and he needs to handle his on his own. This ain't a Pughtatorship.
Minio: Ha, Pughtatorship.
Mugen and Minio bump fists at the joke. The scene fades to black.
The Camera pans to the announce team!
Seem like there might be a little bit of trouble in C4 land. |
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C4 OVER everything bro! |