Riot 494 is plowing through its timeslot like a two-dollar streetwalker, and Bad Company make their entrance. Cort and Ed are smiling and waving to the crowd, and behind them is an OCW red-shirt generic employee carrying the draw box covered in a red cloth.
Cort and Ed enter the ring, microphones in hand.
Cort: Thank you, thank you very much! I’m sure you’re all waiting with bated breath, so without further ado…
Cort motions for the redshirt to get in the ring. He does so, and Cort sticks his foot out, nearly tripping him. Cort laughs as the employee stumbles and regains his balance.
Cort: Under ol’ shakylegs’ cloth here are the obviously innumerable entries for our challenge, so let’s get roight into the news!
Cort motions to Ed, who nods, ripping the cloth off the box and vigorously rubbing it between his buttocks before throwing it into the crowd, where it hits a wheelchair-bound child in the face.
Cort looks greedily at the box before noticing…
Cort: This only has two slips in it.
He stares at the redshirt.
Cort: Only. Two. EXPLAIN!
The redshirt nervously explains...
Redshirt: There were only two entries, sir.
Cort: ONLY TWO!? ARE OUR TITLES NOT THE MOST VALUABLE IN OCW? IS NO-ONE BRAVE ENOUGH TO FIGHT US? DID YOU STEAL THE REST OF THE SLIPS TO FEED YOUR ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT FAMILY?
Redshirt: N-no sir…
Cort sighs.
Cort: Fine! If that’s the way you fucks want it to be, so it shall be! We are going to hold these titles for the rest of time, because…
He fishes around in the box with his eyes closed.
Cort: Our undoubtedly ill-equipped and unworthy challengers ARE…
He squints at the paper with a shocked expression.
Cort: Rust Cohle and…
Cort: … Jookie Marley!?
The crowd pops in shock and surprise.
Cort stammers into the mic.
Cort: T-t-this can’t be right. Ed! Can you read this?
Ed grabs the paper.
Ed: Yup, Cold Rust and Margarine Dookie!
Commentary: Don’t those two hate each other? What is going on!?
Cort: That’s amazing! We have mortal enemies unifying for greed and gold! They have absolutely NO CHANCE!
Cort: Fans, I want you to remember this… we gave ALL OF OCW a chance to assemble the most dominant team to take our titles… and they gave us a coupon for a free win!
Cort throws the paper up into the air and laughs, and Ed starts laughing as well.
Cort: 465, they won’t leave alive!~
He happily jaunts out of the ring and back up the ramp with Ed, stopping to high-five before they disappear into gorilla.
The camera pans to the announce team.
What are the odds?
They are so dead!
The scene opens …
The camera slowly comes into focus revealing the stone cold gaze of BUFFNESS .
McGee - Sensation once again you manage to F@#k me over … You put me in a match with TTT and F@#king C4 !!!
Sean stands up from the weight bench he was sitting on .
McGee - I guess you’re gonna try to tell me you had no parts of this huh … I’ll believe that when the OCW Universe believes God Damn Bobby Minio deserves to be anywhere near a Main Event match .
McGee - You better stay away from me, you are lucky I can't find you now DUCKING all over the building … And that includes that little bitch of son in-law and his Hoe ass wife !!!
Sean snatches a 50 pound dumbbell off the ground and hurls it through a nearby mirror .
McGee - I'm done playing your games Sensation … It's my turn !!!
BUFFNESS stares into the camera as the scene fades to black
The camera pans to the announce team.
Thats one angry dude!
Cuz Sensation keeps screwing him over!
EXTREME RULEZ Mugen vs Ryu Matsumoto
The camera pans to the announce team.
JESUS!
CHRIST
Jim Black is seen searching backstage for any type of exclusive interview he can find. Stacy Clark was popular before but now that she’s been inducted in the OCW Hall of Fame she’s literally the talk of the town.
For once in his life Jim is lucky and sees his golden exclusive in the form of OCW Hall of Famer Tiberius Octavian Dupree. He immediately rushes him like a rookie not ready for his tryout. Dupree is seen pulling a shiny bag of luggage when stopped.
Jim Black: Dupree...Dupree can I get a word.
Dupree just sighs but nods in approval.
Jim Black: At Certified Greatness….
Before Jim can finish his sentence Dupree cuts him off with a sigh and some words of his own.
Dupree: Certified Greatness...nothing great about it James.
Jim Black: My friends call me Jim….
Dupree: Well James….let me tell you why it wasn’t so great. It was the day that integrity died in this business. I know that sounds like something Paul Pugh would say...well he was right when he said it a few weeks back. I just didn’t think he was this right….
Jim looks a bit confused and goes to speak again but is once again cut off.
Dupree: Let me tell you a short story James...a story about a handful of wrestlers who changed OCW with unmatched dedication and passion in a dark age of treachery and angst.
Dupree: A time when the likes of Demons and Hairlines used OCW to further their agendas and feed their insatiable egos.
Dupree: Those first few years were a constant struggle to make this place great again when legends like Nate Ortiz, Versus and Majin were long gone.
Dupree:
We created a new timeline, a timeline where success was based on pure talent and ambition.
Dupree:
A beautiful timeline, a landscape where many have thrived and reached great milestones....talent like the aforementioned Dennis Black and Sophia.
Dupree: We are no longer in that timeline James, those handful of heroes who created that landscape are now portrayed as a handful of cancerous villains out for the throats of the up and coming.
Again Jim Black goes to speak but Dupree is far from finished.
Dupree: No longer seen as the backbone of this company but instead seen as opinionated scrum with agendas of their own.
Dupree:
Those heroes, those guardians are now casted in a Black shadow of entitlement and reckless emotion from every angle, all of us just equal beneath it.
Dupree: Two Weeks ago on Riot was the tipping point for me and Certified Greatness just pushed me completely over the edge….
Jim Black: Is this because you lost your LightHeavyweight Championship to H20?! Is that what you’re talking about?
Ecstatic that he actually got some words in, Jim awaits the response eagerly.
Dupree: Not quite, I did lose my championship yes...I also lost my Summer, but what’s worse James...is I lost my smile, I lost my Ambition to be here.
Dupree:
To be in a place where I can trust the man across the ring from me.
Dupree: There are too many men and women with no socks and no honor in positions of influence here. New Demons, new Hairlines …
Jim Black: Are you referring to what you call the “New Country”?
Tibby gives him the stink eye for interrupting him not once but twice.
Dupree: It wouldn’t be fair to lump all the young talent here into one category, I’m not that blinded by my own Betterness James…
Dupree: H20 is New Country sure, but Harvey is not who I’m referring to….the likes of Kassidy Hayes is not who I’m referring to.
Dupree:
Those guys are the few shining lights of hope through the cloud of Blackness that now engulfs OCW.
Jim is taken back by Dupree actually complimenting someone else besides himself.
Dupree: Hopefully they will become the new heroes in this timeline because I can’t anymore…
Jim Black: You can’t?
Dupree: I can’t because I’m too old for this shit...too old to act like I’m wanted here.
Dupree:
The story comes full circle James, I am now the legend seeking a different ambition, a different timeline away from OCW where I can have peace of mind…
Jim's jaw hits the floor and his eyes pop out their sockets.
Jim Black: YOU'RE QUITTING? What about Always and Forever? What about Riot 500?!
Dupree begins to walk away, his golden bag of luggage being pulled behind him as he reaches the side exit.
