A camera fades in from black to see a Hijo de Mistico, sorting through a small tablet. He is sitting near a side table in a backstage hallway.
Mistico: No…. No….. No…..
Mistico continues to to say “no” as he swipes through the OCW roster page, seemingly trying to guess who his opponent will be tonight.
Mistico: Ay dios mio. Who is this person?
Mistico sees somebody walk past him and perks up.
Mistico: Ah! Maybe he knows…Hey! Hola amigo!
The camera turns around quickly to see tag team champion Ijitu Quartz standing with a grin on his face.
Quartz points at his chest, looking around seeming to not know Mistico is talking to him.
Quartz: You shouting me down, amigo?
Mistico: Yes! I was wondering if you’ve been keeping an ear out there.
Quartz: A what?
Mistico: What’s the rumors backstage amigo?
Quartz awkwardly looks around and points at himself again.
Quartz: Are you sure you’re talking to me? You been drinkin’, guy?
Mistico: Nooo noo. I just don’t know who I’m up against tonight and I was wondering if you had heard anything.
Quartz: Wait, you’re a wrestler?
Mistico shakes his head and pretends what he heard was sarcasm.
Mistico: Aha! Undefeated, my friend.
Quartz: Undefeated? YOU’RE Mistireyo man?
Mistico: … Mistico. Mi-Sti-Co Quartz attention suddenly focuses on the Turmoil star and he adjusts his title belt.
Quartz: Well… I think I do know your opponent tonight. I was actually out looking for you.
Mistico: Ah! That is great news.. So who is it?
Quartz smiles and begins pacing in a small area, shaking his head slowly.
Quartz: Man, I feel bad for ya’. We’ve only just met but I gotta be the one delivering the bad news.
Quartz: Your opponent tonight is a ringer. I think the suits upstairs wanna end your winning streak.
Mistico: Wow.
Quartz: I feel bad for ya’, kid. This guy is scary. I wouldn’t wanna face em.
Quartz smiles once more and begins to walk away.
Mistico: Wait! Aren’t you gonna tell me who it is?
Quartz: Ahhh, you’ll figure it out kiddo. Good luck tonight.
Mistico throws his hands up and plops back down into his chair at the table, continuing to sort through the roster page on ocwfed.com.
Time for a lucha house party!
Wrong show Randy!
Time for the Mexican welcoming party.
HIJO DE MISTICO vs. ?????????
The camera pans to the announce team.
What a fight.
Goodness...
This just keeps getting better and better.
Previously Recorded
The scene opens in Valkyrie's apartment. She's chilling with Bruce Springsteen and Eminem
Eminem: Yo Valk, you know why I released Kamikaze?
Valkyrie: Because you were sick and tired of mumble rappers and you wanted to diss the entire hip hop scene.
Eminem: No. I did it because I wanted to impress you…
Valkyrie: Impress me?
Valkyrie blushes a little
Eminem: Yes. When I listened to the Heather Angelo Diss Track, I realised I wanted to write a song with you…
Eminem: The Heather Angelo Diss is the greatest song of all time and I think even Bruce here can agree
Bruce Springsteen: No doubt about that. But Valkyrie, you have the voice of an angel. You should be singing love songs with me.
Bruce Springsteen: Think about it: we could write depressing songs on how sad it is to live and work in Nebraska or getting married in your early 20s like I did in The River...
Valkyrie: Shut up, both of you.
Valkyrie: First off, it's 2018 and nobody cares about you anymore, Bruce. All people care about is diss tracks but I just lost my best ghost writer…
Valkyrie: I cannot believe they arrested 6ix9ine… He did nothing wrong. #Free6ix9ine
Bruce Springsteen sighs
Bruce Springsteen: Let me tell you. You don't understand much about music.
Eminem: Valk, Who cares about 6ix9ine? You still have me.
Eminem: Let's write the Heather Angelo diss track together
Eminem: I already have some sick ass bars in mind… check this out
Eminem: I hope Heather is really in love with Kass…
Eminem: ...because I will stick his Bible up her ass
Valkyrie: Hey! Keep it PG. Kids are watching.
Eminem: Oops, I'm sorry. Then what about this one?
Eminem:Valkyrie will guide you through Darkness with her Light…
Eminem: … she's the Angel who will light up Devil's Night
Valkyrie: This one is sick. I love it.
Valkyrie: *Think emoji*
Valkyrie: You know what, Em? Let's write the Heather Angelo diss track 2 together.
Valkyrie dabs with Eminem as Bruce Springsteen shakes his head in disapproval
