Stacy: Welcome back everyone to this Special Edition of the Clark Effect, let us continue this Old Country vs. New Country exclusive interview with a few more questions for Dupree and H2O.
Stacy: Let’s talk about what happened on Riot last week, where B2O picked up a huge tag team win against the former and current Light Heavyweight Champions Dupree and Pugh, Harvey can you tell us anything particular about that match?!
Before Stacy can get an answer from H2O Dupree immediately cuts in.
Dupree: He should tell you how we were freaking screwed. How the plebs upstairs cutting the checks want new faces in the spotlight at any cost. That was freaking evident by the referee refusing to count when victory was assured for me and Pugh….
Dupree: Him and his boyfriend Baker didn’t deserve that win, just like he doesn’t deserve a shot at this tonight!
Tibby stands up putting the Lightheavyweight Championship just inches from Harvey’s face. Harvey’s eyebrows descend as he ascends to his feet to speak.
H2O: I’m still trying to figure out who’s the child sitting before you Stacy, him or me.
Just as Stacy begins to answer.
H2O: Don’t answer that, doll. Tibby turned on the TV back there and watched the Olympics during our break.
Stacy: Oh yeah?
H2O: Yeah. I was watching him from outside the room and he put on Curling and watched Canada lose to Switzerland. He got very upset.
Tibby stops straightening his hair and tunes in to Harvey and Stacy conversation. Tibby annoyance grows as he just learned he wasn’t the only one in the room watching The Olympics.
Stacy: Why wouldn’t he be upset? He is from Canada you know?
H2O: (Chuckles) No Stacy. He wasn’t upset that Canada lost. He was upset because he thought The Olympic sport of Curling was a Big Hair Competition.
Stacy chuckles and looks towards Dupree and she immediately stopped. Dupree was not amused as he too stares at Harvey with such displeasure.
H2O: Any dumb Barbie, like this big legged child across from me, deserved to lose that tag match and doesn’t deserve to hold a prestigious title like The Light Heavyweight Title.
Dupree: You’re as delusional as you are green. You couldn’t beat Paul Pugh with a hundred and one tries and your not going to beat me either with a single one, that’s a fact.
He points a perfectly manicured finger in Harvey’s face.
Dupree: You don’t even have a lunch worth eating or a timeline worth destroying. You’ve hovered my home, you’ve rushed my sanctuary. Even that cuck you call a partner stole a win from the glorious Old Country that built this company.
H2O: There’s no more room here for guys like you and Pepe. Tonight, this company is going to cut the ribbon for The New Country.
H2O: Cause there’s “No Country For Old Men” anymore in this business.
The two are standing nearly nose to nose, Stacy maybe regretting her peaceful words from earlier.
Dupree: Go ahead hit me, show Stacy here why I’m the professional and you’re just some kid playing dress up on grown folk’s time. Go ahead Harvey...do it!
He smiles in his face just waiting for a strike or kick from his challenger.
H2O: All this time I wanted this moment right here. To fight….But I’ll wait. It’s not The New Country Way.
H2O: The person that I am is a gift from God. The person that’ll become will be a gift I return to him. Since you think you’re God….you’ll receive your gift from me very soon.
Instead of taking the Light Heavyweight Champions head off with a Rip Tide he gives him a malicious smile of his own before walking away leaving a confounded Tibby.
Stacy: Do you have anything else to say Tiberius?
Tibby just looks at her with his usual disgust, looks at his championship then walks away with a very determined look on his face. The camera pans back to Stacy.
Stacy: I would like to thank you all for joining this Special Edition of the Clark Effect, enjoy the rest of the show!
The camera fades with the OCW Clark Effect logo appearing.
The Camera pans to the announce team!
 |
Whew! |
 |
Dupree shoulda leveled that H2JERK! |
Katherine vs Sophia*
The Camera pans to the announce team!
|
SHE GOT ALL OF IT! |
|
OH JEEEEZ! |
Ricky was all smiles after his match walking backstage pushing the door open about to walk through as his arm is tugged turning to see Stacey Clarke he closed the door before turning to Stacey smiling at her.
Ricky: Go ahead Stacey ask your questions.
Stacey: First off congratulations on the win how does this win feel compared to the win at your first PPV against Wrex.
Ricky: Its a bit different I think Wrex was trying to get the best out of me and I was a bit lucky to get that win it was also on the preshow whereas this was on the main PPV show and Seth tried to take away a part of who I am so I would say tonight was the more satisfying win.
Stacey: So whats next for you?
Ricky: Don't really know whats next but whatever it is I will be ready and now if you don't mind Stacey going to head into the locker room and celebrate with my tag team partner.
Ricky opened the door and headed into the room walking over to Corey fist bumping.
Corey: Good win man, a win over a guy like this surely should elevate you up the standings a bit.
He grabbed his bag and got ready to leave.
Corey: We gonna go to the bar tonight? I know a place that two guys like us can get some decent drinks, it run by a hermaphrodite that B-17 had a fling with.
Ricky nodded.
Corey: So if you want to get ready I'll meet you in the car park, we can discuss what's next for us too.
Ricky: Sure thing will see you there shortly.
The scene faded to black as he got changed and headed for the parking lot.
The Camera pans to the announce team!
|
Let the good times roll! |
|
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO |
THE PERFECT CIRCLE
K.DAngelo/Tobin Frost/RD Money
vs
Dennis Black
The Camera pans to the announce team!
|
He did! |
|
YES he did! |
The shot opens with Cort and Ed sitting on stools in a temporary promo room, black cloth draped over a wall for the background. Between the two of them is an old, beige computer showing a familiar webpage...
Cort: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
Ed: COMPUTER!
Cort shushes Ed.
Cort: We'll get to that in a bit.
Cort clears his throat.
Cort: … As I was about to say, it's come to my attention that nobody has answered our challenge. Is that because they're busy?
Cort: No. It's because they're COWARDS. So for those of you who are so terrified of promo time that you'd rather die an 80 year old man on the undercard, we've paid a fat computer nerd just like most of you fans to make us an online application.
Cort gestures toward the computer.
Cort: But I know how confusing this newfangled “internet” thing can be, and so I decided to do you all a favour and have Ed here walk you through a demonstration of how to apply to face us on Riot. Ed?
Ed reaches down beneath the stool and places a pair of thick, 50's style glasses on his face.
He turns to face the computer while Cort narrates in his best inside voice.
Cort: First, go down to the “Internet Explorer” icon on your desktop. I'm told some of you use other browsers, but I mean, what else is there? Netscape? Don't be an idiot.
Cort: Then, type “www.ocwfed.com” into the search bar.
Ed begins to type, one finger at a time, and with enough force to bounce the opposite side of the keyboard.
Cort: Once there, navigate to the “Forum” tab, scroll down until you see “The Locker Room.” Don't worry about anyone trying to shove a broom up your ass, this locker room is only virtual.
Cort: And there, as you can see on screen, we have what is called a “thread” where you will “post” your “online application.”
Ed jabs a finger into the monitor, nearly knocking the computer off the desk.
Cort: The rules are simple! Just make an entry with your name and your tag partner's name (one entry per team) and we will randomly draw during Riot 494 to find out which team of lucky losers gets destroyed on 495! If they lose, it's on to the next team. If they win, they get their title shot on Pay Per View.
Cort: So don't wait. Don't delay! Apply for your 0.05% chance at taking our tag titles today. After all, challenging your betters is a great way to get a PPV paycheck if you're an undeserving slob.
Cort smiles his best honest smile. It's not convincing. Meanwhile, Ed tries to click back off the page but the site 503’s. He clicks the mouse a few times, slaps the computer, and smashes the keyboard before screaming in rage and throwing the computer off camera. Cort just continues to smile as an 80's digital jingle plays and the camera fades out.
The Camera pans to the announce team!
|
Oh for the love of Pete! |
|
I let them use my computer.................. |