Jonny D: I’m a senior citizen?

In yet another dark room the lights flicker on to reveal a dingy bar. There are various crocodile heads mounted on the wall.

Jonny D: God dammit, not again… again.

Behind the bar we see a vaguely familiar man polishing a glass. When he turns to speak to Jonny we see a grizzled battle scarred face, with a metal plate and glowing red eye on the upper half of his face.

Man: Whatcha buyin’ strangah?

Jonny D: I thought you were dead. I watched you get eaten by a T-Rex!

Man: Funny thing about a T-Rex’s metabolism, mate, works reaaaaaal slow. Slow enough that I can work my magic with a knife.

The man produces a knife and jams it into the bar in front of him. Smiling from ear to ear.

Man: So when did you start working with that cunt Ligermask?

Jonny D: Right before I got sent to Drago Island. Ligermask and the Blacklist made a deal.

The Aussie lets out a hearty laugh.

Jonny D: He wants the original Ligermask Mask. I couldn’t find it.

Man: Couldn’t? Or... wouldn’t bruhv?

Jonny D: Thing is cursed. It’s a lost cause.

Man: Wot? So is that why your tag team partnah Wheelah ain’t here.

Jonny just slam his fist on the bar table. The man lets out an amused smile.

Man: I’m not. Didja miss me!

The man sarcastically opens his arms for a hug as Jonny just shakes his head.

Man: Anyways long story short, Ligermask works for me! That means that you’ll get me the original Ligermask Mask roight?

Jonny D: ...No deal.

The man just waves his pointer finger.

Man: Tsk. Tsk. Don’t be like that luv. Oy ya see normly that’d be fine, but I got somethin’ you want. Mah boys dem, ah they ‘ave been followin’ ye. We know ya secret.

Jonny D: Is it that obvious?

Man: Rrrrreally obvious.

Jonny D gives a nervous look and starts pulling a bit on his collar.

Man: Your unemployment. You’ve been collectin’ a lot uv dollarydoos my friend.

Jonny lets out a sigh of relief and a small laugh.

Jonny D: Heh, yeah in a single day Mugen fired me a record sixteen times.

Man: The paycheck is insane from the amount of times ya bin hiyahd and fiyahd. So many times my friend. Can feed at least thirty-two blokes with that type of moneh, but you can’t collect it can ya? That’s because I have it!

He snaps his fingers showing a contract that “The Blacklist” signed with Ligermask.

Man: Right here my organization owns all unemployment from our employees and you Jonny D are an employee! HA HA HA! DIDJA MISS ME?!

Jonny D: F*** *** * * **** *** * ** * ********* ************ *********** ********* ** * **** ******* *****

Man: Now I’m a fair man. We go way back. My boss wants this unemployment money, but he also really wants to possess the original Ligermask Mask. Would you be willing ta wrassle again? Double or nuthin’ against the man who is undefeated at pay per view this season. Liger Mask.

Jonny D: Seriously? Dude you’re on! He’s been undefeated this season? I’ve been undefeated on pay per views FOREVER! I accept your whack ass challenge now take that barbie on your shrimp and smoke it!

Jonny D walks out of the room laughing.

Jonny D: BAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA HA HAH!

The metal faced man washes one of his many glasses and smirks as the camera reveals the outside of the bar. Jonny D is in the middle of a dense jungle outpost and a kangaroo hops by in the foreground.

Jonny D: AUSTRALIA!?

The camera pans to the announce team.

	WHAT IN THE F...
	What, what, what, what, what!

Ryu Matsumoto swaggers into a conference room setup. He’s grinning ear to ear as he makes his way to a table covered in black cloth, with a blank tv behind it.

Ryu rubs his nose, smiling with an arrogant charm. He begins

RYU: How are y’all doing tonight?

Ryu pauses, but before the media has a moment to respond he cuts in.

RYU: DON’T MATTER! What we’re here to talk about is my latest business venture.

RYU: As you know, the Trashiest Man on earth has conquered Wrestling, he’s conquered MMA, he’s conquered Communication Technology, he’s conquered the Music Industry, he’s conquered the Political Arena… and now he’s set his sights on the Luxury Sportswear Industry.

RYU: It is with great pleasure that I introduce T T T, The Trill Trash Trademark!

He grabs the cover off the table with a flourish and unveils a table full of sneakers, fitted caps, compression wear, sports clothes and other assorted merchandise. The TV behind him lights up with the TTT logo.

RYU: And it is with even greater pleasure that I introduce the first ever wave of TTT sponsored Sports Entertainment Athletes.

Ryu begins clapping as Kassidy Hayes steps into the room, he walks up to Ryu and gives him a hug, not unlike one that a son would give his father

Kassidy grabs a TTT hoodie of the table and put it on. As he finishes Heather Angelo enters wearing TTT Hotpants and a TTT “Stay In Yo Lane Jay” Tank Top. As she walks by Ryu he slaps her on the ass and winks with his one working eye… which perplexes the members of the media

RYU: And our biggest acquisition, I’d like to present you all with the World Ex and Television Champion, Dennis Black!

Dennis walks in calmly holding both belts and smiling. He reaches out a hand to shake Ryu’s. Ryu instead daps him up, much to Dennis’ confusion to which Dennis cups Ryu’s hand. Dennis approaches the table and quickly slips into a TTT track jacket

Ryu walks up to the three and puts on a TTT fitted cap. Smiling he puts his arms around the newest Trill Trash Trademark Ambassadors

RYU: PHOTO OP!

The camera pans to the announce team.

	MOTHER OF GOD!
	YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

The Camera Pans To The Ramp!

This guy’s sole job is to take facial expressions from said wrestler and to hand them a microphone. Such a sad soul. His life is the definition of mediocre, at least every so often he’s graced with an omnipotent force, a unbelievably OVERpowering presence known as The Betterness.

“That Guy” fades back to irrelevancy as always and “He with the Iron Knee” speaks, you listen.

Dupree: We all know I’ve eaten my share of lunches in my career, possibly more than our disgustingly overweight North American Champion.

There’s a huge pop for the man that’s damn near the size of North America, Bill Ding.

Dupree: Metaphorically speaking that is, as obviously I’ve dropped a few pounds lately. Mmmmm….

The hard camera pans in for a close up of his incredibly hard…..abs. You’d get excited about yourself too, if you were the Betterness, but you ain’t so you have no gavel to judge, pleb.

Dupree: Anyway, I’ve never had a fondness for DUCK! Metaphorically speaking that is, it’s a foul and cowardly thing. Exactly what Paul Pugh is!

Just talking about Pugh makes Tibby sick to his stomach. Ugh.

Dupree: Every time I get close to fighting you again, somehow someway someone intervenes. I’ve even tried to knee your neck outta your neck at the airport, but you emptied your fanny pack and paid security to keep me at bay. I see through your shenanigans Paula…

That dim witted cretin in the front row holding a “Real Men wear Fanny Packs” sign should be slapped into the darkest timeline.

Dupree: Just like at the subway station when I tried to knee your chest outta your chest, you probably….no most definitely exchanged sexual favors with the transit authority to conspire against my Betterness.

Dupree: You freaking disgust me!

Dupree: So get your flabby ass out here, let me end your career. Take the Lightheavyweight Championship and leave you just enough mobility in your limbs to use a freaking rocking chair.

There’s a seriously long pause, is he even coming out? He’s probably stalking a rookie in the bathroom, that is his modus operandi.

The Camera Pans To The Ramp!

The Captain of the little guy ship stands before Dupree as they exchange stares for a moment. Then another. Then another. Another moment. What I'm trying to say is it's a long time or whatever.

Pugh: Do you ever stop yakking? Give your jaw a rest for a second while I address my people. They don't wanna hear from a failure brother.

Dupree tries to cut in but Pugh holds up his finger to shush him. The crowd pops huge as Pugh looks into the camera.

Pugh: Ladies and Gentlemen. I am here tonight to present myself before you. To expose myself to the millions and millions on live tv at home. To unveil myself in…

Dupree puts his hand on Pughs shoulder and calls him over. After a hushed conversation both men nod and Pugh continues.

Pugh: … So it seems that I may have just sounded like I was going to pull my dick out on live tv. For that, I can only apologise to you all.

Pugh: Rest assured I will keep little Ego in his holster… so I don't make Dupree jealous of the largest penis in the Lightweight Division!

The crowd cheer as Dupree starts yelling at Pugh. Just as this kicks off Mugen comes from the crowd right below the newly repurposed D.A.M Skybox.

Wearing his custom issued Manchester United jersey underneath his leather jacket. Mugen saunters to the ring with a huge grin on his face.

Mugen: Guys…..guys…..guys. Can’t we all just get along? Look at you two, you are some of the greatest men to step into an OCW ring.

Both Tibby and Pugh scoff at Mugen’s remarks in the ring.

Mugen: Come on! This isn’t coming from Mugen the evil Overlord. This is coming from The People’s Champion, Mugen. Look at me, I literally just came to the ring from the crowd! THEY LOVE ME!

Mugen starts thanking the crowd by mouthing “Thank You” to them repeatedly.

Mugen: Now what do you say, you two shake hands and make up.

Mugen motions for Tibby and Pugh to shake hands in the middle of the ring.

They both come closer and closer and both reach out their right hands for a shake when they suddenly nod at each other and punch Mugen in the face.

Startled by the punches, Mugen rolls out of the ring.

Mugen: YOU SONS OF BITCHES! I AM TRYING TO HELP! VERSUS IS TRYING TO MAKE ME BE A KIND INDIVIDUAL, HELP ME BE THE REAL PEOPLES CHAMPION THAT I AM AND YOU DO THIS?!

Mugen: You two have just earned a match with ME!

Dupree just sighs heavily, knowing how terribly unsafe Mugen is inside this ring but readies himself for combat.

Paul Pugh vs Tiberius Dupree vs
Mugen

The camera pans to the announce team.

	HE GOT IT, HE GOT IT!!!
	WOW!